LOVE YOU SHELLEY

I'm just someone who has been where you are, just as many before me have gone where I am going.

Occasionally, I'll receive an email from someone and my response to them astounds me. (no reference to persons has been made to protect the innocent).

"In the end I think it's just a patience thing and it really is very simple. We tend to overthink and complicate matters. I needed to learn to "love myself fat" and take good care of myself. I believe that it takes time for you to trust yourself and therefore your body to follow suit. What's helped me tremendously is writing affirmations the old fashioned way (pen and paper) just like writing lines at school when you were in trouble. I writes things such as "I am worthy, I deserve, I am, I can" statements. It takes just 5 or 10 minutes each day and I actually now believe what I'm writing, whereas once upon a time I didn't. Sometimes I don't recognise the person I now am and am thrilled with myself and who I am these days."

"The hardest thing is making a start and you've done that with the walking so don't let anyone or anything stop you from doing it if you enjoy it. Of course, every now and then, there may be times where you simply can't fit it in and that's ok also, it's life and sometimes life gets in the way."

"When I get upset about others Dave has a saying that helps me which is simply "it's not my problem" and although you are and will always be there for her "she's not your problem!" You need to say it over and over and over again - "it's not my problem, it's not my problem, it's not my problem." Of course, you love and care about her and her well-being but you can't get her out of her depression. She has to do that. You can offer suggestions - counselling, reading, self-help books, meditation, writing affirmations, gentle exercise (walking, yoga), etc but she has to take the action and get the ball rolling. The small things add up to big things and it's the small things that gain momentum so just something as simple as walking can lead to something greater."

"Although I'd love to be thin I will not allow my body shape or size to determine how I think, what I feel and how I live my life. If I can be happy now I can be happy at any weight."

Love you Shelley xxx

Another fruit bowl with note left in our room:

"When we take time to notice the simple things in life, we never lack for encouragement. We discover we are surrounded by a limited hope that's just wearing everyday clothes."