Monday, August 30, 2010
Friday, August 27, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
In other Tuesday news, I joined the Sports Centre for 25 pounds for a month giving me access to the gym, pool and fitness classes. I never thought this would happen but last night I had a crack at the "Boxercise" class and blimey love, it was fucken brilliant! I met some lovely ladies, chatted, punched, laughed and even sweated a bit too :) I walked home on cloud nine basking in the endorphins and commended myself on getting involved in something new. It's been a long time since I've done a group exercise class. Tonight is "Circuit Training" and tomorrow night "Fitball." Laughing at what Matt would say about that (hahaha).
Monday, August 23, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
I'm craving some routine, as is Dave and moreso the children. Hence my little hissy fit yesterday. London has been wonderful but hectic with no rest days as were scheduled in Bali. Traipsing around with tired children and sore feet starts to get on your nerves a bit after a few days. This is why this adventure was not about being tourists as such but moreso about experiencing how others live which is why we've based ourselves in places for weeks at a time. I'm craving a little bit of normality such as daily walks in nature, home prepared meals, meditation, reading and prayer which have fallen by the wayside in the past week. That's ok. Life still goes on but these things enhance my life and make me really, really, really happy. I did, however, head out for a walk again this morning just as daylight was breaking, which was refreshing and tranquil.
You can see my furry friends here.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
My conclusion? It doesn't matter what happens in life and your circumstances. Nothing ever stays the same. It's all a continual process of change. Some good, some bad. Whatever happens, happens. Let whatever be, be.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
In the basket was almond milk, rice milk, brown rice protein, pea protein, vegan protein, greens powder, pom juice, coconut juice, oats, brown rice, psyllium husks, goji berries, agave syrup, peanut butter, almond butter, himalayan pink salt, tamari and a few raw food bars. I was pretty stoked with my purchases.
Pret A Manger is a really cool place. A fast food joint selling delicious tasting natural food. I opted for the Butternut Squash and Spinach Soup and it was de-lic-ous! These places are everywhere which is awesome and a step in the right direction in terms of fast food chains.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
I wept silently as we drove away from the hotel towards the airport. I knew this trip would be life changing but didn't realise it would happen so soon. Dave commented that I was quite chilled packing the bags but underneath I felt flooded with stress. I kept it to myself. Stage one down. What will stage two bring? I have learnt so much more about myself and the way in which I fit into the Universe in just three short weeks. Believing and trusting my thoughts and judgements that little bit more each day. Amazed at my strength of character. I'm committed to my search for freedom and know that I will find it! And I'm still getting the tattoo when the time is right.
There's a freedom kind of feeling when you don't give a fuck about what people think. A sort of anonymity. Yet, I know you're out there reading and probably got me on "wanker alert" but I couldn't give two shits. I care about you but don't care what you think of me :) I'm over trying to impress others. I'm me and this is who I am.
Not sure about blogger rules but figured I'd best be on my best behaviour and add the adult content warning upon opening. Did you get excited about that?
I've always loved being tanned but I'd have to say that this one even beats the solarium days. Got the tits to prove it.
The last of the pampering happened yesterday. The boys went to the pub to watch the football. The girls to the spa. Package 2 - Full Body Massage, Body Scrub, Facial - 2 hours - 130,000 rupiah ($16). You want medium or strong massage? Medium please. Okay? Little bit more strong please. Okay now? Very good. Thank you. I soaked up every last bit of relaxation like a sponge begging my body to hold onto the calmness. Lying face down, in all but my undies, I am coated in a mud like substance and left to dry. Then, with the bare of her hands, rubbed until the mud rolled into little plasticine type worms and off my body. Turn over please. I am covered by a thin sheet which is lifted to reveal my legs firstly. I wonder what will happen when she reaches the top but I do not have to wonder long for the sheet is removed and there they are, my tits. Out there and happening. She spreads the mud gently over them completely and once again I'm covered with the sheet and left to dry. Removal time and I have to use all of my might to not crack a smile for fear of her thinking I'm getting turned on by her touching my breasts. I'm laughing under my breath and thinking thank God Sofie opted for a hair wash rather than a body scrub. She'd be freaking out right about now. God, I hope my nipples aren't erect. Wonder if she realises I have implants? Would she even know what they are? Lucky I've got my knickers on. Do they do brazilians in Bali? My thoughts are interupted. Shower please. Lastly, my face is relieved of all the grease from sunscreen. I've felt like a grease bucket all week breaking out in a few pimples which could also have been hormone pimples from the early arrival of TOM. I'm thankful there's only a need for a surfboard now and hence no changing corks over smelly, dirty dunny's.
Going surfing now.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
No I never felt like this before
Yes I swear, it's the truth
And I owe it all to you
Cause I've had the time of my life
I can safely say that this had been my best holiday ever. And it's only just begun!
Sampai jumpa and Sampai ketemu lagi Sanur and Bali. Love you. I'll be back!
I can tell you it's sheer relief to be leaving on such good terms and in such a good headspace. It feels like I'm experiencing whatever it is for the very first time which seems new and wonderful. I have been calmed by the gentleness of Bali. The warmth of the people wrapping me up in a blanket of kindness. A layer of understanding has started to surface. I have been guided by the unknown. Blessed beyond belief. I wish I had more time here to listen to lessons of life, humanity and self-respect but it is not to be, just yet. Balinese have a fundamental belief that only three relationships matter in life: your relationship with God, your relationship with nature, and your relationship with mankind. This is their secret to inner power. Thank you for teaching me this.
Look out London, here comes Shelley Stark.
The idealism of female beauty is a body with a slim hourglass figure with tiny waste and slim arms, just as in many other countries. An overweight body is a sign of imbalance and lack of harmony. It is only people without faith who need to "find themselves." They pay great attention to personal hygiene and cleanliness using an aromatherapy ritual, after washing, as an act of what we call self-care of self-love. The body is the vehicle of the soul.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
- Hose your bum hole after pooing.
- Massage arse cheeks when giving a full body massage.
- Eat rice with your fingers.
- Slow down. Life will wait for you.
Some things Aussie's could teach Balinese:
- Smoking in restaurants, especially when others are eating, is fucking disgusting.
- If we say "no, thanks" we mean no fucking thanks.
- Cooking with a lot less oil is much healthier.
I'm just saying.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
In my dreams I own this house and have renovated it, with the help of Balinese tradespeople, restoring it back to immaculate condition full of Balinese architecture. I live here with Dave, Sofie and Jayden. Jason comes to stay every school holidays sometimes bringing his girlfriend or a mate too. Our families visit often, as do some of our friends, so there is never a shortage of people in the house, ensuring lots of fun and laughter. We have a handsome maid:
who does all of the cleaning and cooking, making us delicious healthy fare. He is a gentle man whom the kids adore. We are very grateful to have his help. We own an electric blue Yamaha scooter with which we transport the kids to school. They are attending a local school, translating English for them, but also learning the Indonesian language. They love school, even though they attend six days per week, as they finish at lunchtime each day leaving plenty of time for swimming in our pool and massages by our therapist who arrives at 3 pm each afternoon. My early mornings are spent walking or running along the beach front sometimes accompanied by Dave or one of our guests or some of the local friends I've made. I'm teaching our friends the joy of exercise and how to lift some really heavy shit. They, in return, are teaching me how to walk straight and tall so that I won't let my basket fall. My Indonesian is coming along nicely. I can communicate enough to get by which has been of great benefit when learning with my spiritual teacher whom speaks little English. He once told me that "death is easy, life is hard." As each day passes I'm making sure that I'm living a meaningful life, one full of adventure with no regrets.
Have I forgotten anything? I'm not nutso. I did say it was "in my dreams." A girl can fantasize can't she?
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Friday, August 6, 2010
Occasionally, I'll receive an email from someone and my response to them astounds me. (no reference to persons has been made to protect the innocent).
"In the end I think it's just a patience thing and it really is very simple. We tend to overthink and complicate matters. I needed to learn to "love myself fat" and take good care of myself. I believe that it takes time for you to trust yourself and therefore your body to follow suit. What's helped me tremendously is writing affirmations the old fashioned way (pen and paper) just like writing lines at school when you were in trouble. I writes things such as "I am worthy, I deserve, I am, I can" statements. It takes just 5 or 10 minutes each day and I actually now believe what I'm writing, whereas once upon a time I didn't. Sometimes I don't recognise the person I now am and am thrilled with myself and who I am these days."
"The hardest thing is making a start and you've done that with the walking so don't let anyone or anything stop you from doing it if you enjoy it. Of course, every now and then, there may be times where you simply can't fit it in and that's ok also, it's life and sometimes life gets in the way."
"When I get upset about others Dave has a saying that helps me which is simply "it's not my problem" and although you are and will always be there for her "she's not your problem!" You need to say it over and over and over again - "it's not my problem, it's not my problem, it's not my problem." Of course, you love and care about her and her well-being but you can't get her out of her depression. She has to do that. You can offer suggestions - counselling, reading, self-help books, meditation, writing affirmations, gentle exercise (walking, yoga), etc but she has to take the action and get the ball rolling. The small things add up to big things and it's the small things that gain momentum so just something as simple as walking can lead to something greater."
"Although I'd love to be thin I will not allow my body shape or size to determine how I think, what I feel and how I live my life. If I can be happy now I can be happy at any weight."
Love you Shelley xxx
Another fruit bowl with note left in our room:
"When we take time to notice the simple things in life, we never lack for encouragement. We discover we are surrounded by a limited hope that's just wearing everyday clothes."
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
This was on our table today at the coffee/cocoa plantation. Pure tobacco (no chemicals or nicotine)
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
It occurred to me this morning that I was whingeing over having to wash the dishes the old fashioned way, in the sink. Other than the cooking, which I've now minimised, and clothes washing I'm doing jack shit. Every morning the doorbell rings and we're greeted with "selamat pagi" by our gorgeous housekeeper. He makes our beds, cleans our bathrooms, delivers fresh towels, handtowels, teatowels, washers and bathmats and sweeps and mops the floors. If only I could take him home. So, no more whining from me. It's the least I can do.
I've got some basic lingo down pat. Dave was impressed yesterday when I had a very mini conversation with the kids club carer, Yugi:
"Pagi. Apa kabar."
"Baik-baik saja. Apa kabar."
Sunday, August 1, 2010
I was amused in the supermarket yesterday when I seen this. A stand full of different protein powders and such. I didn't think I'd see this stuff over here. I didn't buy any though (I'm int0 pea protein powder these days, without the added crap) and forgot to look at the price but if my oats are anything to go by I bet they cost a shit load. Can you believe I'm paying $11 for a bag of fucking oats?