I AM GRATEFUL

Today I remember the people who have made a meaningful contribution in my life. Because of them I have learned to live more fully.

Just as I build upon the acts and achievements of those who have done this before me, others may build upon my life's example. As I remember others today, others may remember me in the future.

Today I take a few moments to appreciate those who taught me by example, to honour those who showed me the way. Their love and their willingness have changed my life for the better, and I am grateful.

I'm thinking my deadlifting days are over. I pulled a 130 kg again today but it seems that this is where I've topped out. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little sad and disappointed that I'm not stronger and able to get the mother fucker, 3 plates a side, off the ground, but that's strength training and life still goes on. I'm not going to get sentimental about it. I'm going to remember it as a fond memory of what I could do.

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"Intuition is a powerful force."

WE'S BIN SHOPPIN' AGAIN

We already have one laptop backpak but since we'll be taking two laptops (mine and Sofie's) we needed another. Sofie chose the red Blackwolf Tornado to carry hers and I'll use the one we already have. We went with Blackwolf brand since this is what our other luggage is.





















We then needed two other backpaks to be used as carry on baggage and to transport ipods, nintendos, snacks, water bottles, pads, pencils and books, plus mobile phones, sunnies, purses, wallets and documentation. Dave chose the black Blackwolf Freestyle whilst Jayden went for the bumble bee look with yellow. We figured this was a good choice if he got separated from us. We'd see him a mile away.

We also picked up a suitcase scale with tape measure and a worldwide electrical adaptor set.

IT MAKES ME SICK

It makes me sick to read in the Body + Soul section of The Sunday Mail today about another diet craze - the Dukan Diet, claiming the secret that keeps French women slim. For fuck sake! If I could have but one wish, other than world peace, it would be for people, especially women, to realise that no "diet" will ever give them the body they want for ever. That they are not their bodies, that the shape and size of their body does not determine who they are. The sooner they realise this the better off they, and all those around them, will be. As for the Dukan diet and the rest of the diet industry - GO FUCK YOURSELF!

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"We have been sold a lifestyle, when what our soul desired was life."

WHAT KIDS DO FOR FUN ON FRIDAY NIGHT

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"Quieten your mind and remove distractions."

FALLING IN LOVE

Whilst the outer continues to change, the inner is changing somewhat too. I am falling in love with life over and over again. A powerful current of life-giving energy is infusing every cell, fiber and tissue within me with health, wellness and wholeness. I am no longer the person I once was. Of course I am still me; powerful, intelligent and interesting. I am complicated and valuable and I am a good person. My individuality is like a wave in the ocean of universality and just as each wave expresses its own unique qualities and talents, it retains its essential oceanic nature. Living and loving from the centre of my being I am always at home with myself.

"Following your inner truth gives a newfound sense of freedom."

SEE YA BLONDIE

For as long as I can remember I've always had blonde in my hair, at the very least, around my face. I think the last time I had dark hair was at my sister's wedding 13 or so years ago. I'm often asked what my natural hair colour is and it's been so long I don't really know although I say it's pretty dark. I decided that it might be more practical going overseas with just one colour all over with that being a dark one (like when have I ever been practical or had practical hair?) That way I can just leave it or if I feel like a colour I can pick up a home job. So, today, I took the plunge and got my hair coloured and when I walked back to the mirror after the basin I said, "oh my God, what have I done?" and then proceeded to piss myself laughing. It's such a shock and I don't know if I like it or not. I know that it's just because it's new and will take a bit of adjusting but it really makes you feel good when you pick up the kids from school and Sofie says, "now you're an embarrassing Mum." Wasn't I embarrassing with a mowhawk or three different blocks of colour in my hair before? Perhaps I should just shave it all off and then we'd see embarrassing! Just kids, I know, but she really doesn't like it. I'm gonna go look at it one more time. Maybe I need to shower and wash it?

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"Tune into your intuition to create your desired reality."

THE INVITATION

The Invitation, from the book written by Oriah Mountain Dreamer:

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you can stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

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"Everyone has intuition but few know how to tap into it."

MORE MONEY, MORE MONEY, HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO

Right, so we've just forked out more money. This time finalising our Bali Resort, London Hotel and Cotswolds Cottage. We've also pre-paid and purchased oyster cards, and tickets for the hop on, hop off bus in London.

Added to our recent purchases was this little baby. A 500 gig external hard-drive completely loaded with movies all of all kinds for all age groups. There's chick flicks, kids movies, blood and guts, family classics and much more. Should keep the kids occupied during flights, car travel and any other time I need time out - from them!

BOOK PLUG

Healing Your Feelings with the help of P.S.H. Therapy by Greg Brice.

Further details and book here.

Today has been another magical day. After fluffing around for the first part of the morning I met with Liz and we set off on foot from my place, after firstly introducing her to my stairs! First stop was the Brisbane Library and after I had found what I went looking for we exited the building excited to see the farmers markets just outside. It's located at the top of the Queen Street Mall and apparently there every Wednesday. Everything looked beautiful and I came home with some smoked salmon for hubby which will earn me brownie points. I did have my first taste of salmon but nah, still don't like it. It was then to R Sushi which I'd read about on Steph's blog a while ago. And yeah, it's pretty damn good and cheap! After a short stay in Anzac Square eating and chatting it was time to head home and finish the fluffing I didn't get done in the morning. This city life is really agreeing with me. Love it!

"We create everything that comes into our lives."

FUCK YOU SOCIETY

We have been conditioned by society to believe certain lies. Lies that try and keep us tangled in their web of deceipt, causing us pain and suffering. Well I say "fuck you society". When we learn the truth, the lesson of "our truth" then the pain and suffering turns to happiness and freedom.

"Human beings always look for a rational, linear explanation but instead you have to learn to think outside the square."

THE SIMPLE PLEASURE OF WALKING

For the last few years I killed myself with cardio. Not just any 'ol cardio but high intensity, intervals, and all that other jazz. I lost my passion for it and ended up hating cardio (of any kind). I was always made to believe that walking doesn't "do" enough. That "results" won't happen. Yet, I'd forgotten the simple pleasure of walking. It's now being re-discovered. I love walking, especially early morning, when the sun is yet to rise and the air is crisp and still. I love the feeling I get when I do it and also afterwards. It energizes me and gives me that "get up and go" for the day ahead. I love the calmness and clarity of direction that comes to me through deep insights into the future. And because I love it, it's not a chore, and I consciously look for ways to fit more walking into my day with incidental exercise. It's long term and sustainable. It works for me.

Deadlift

- pulled out at 130 x 5 rack's due to back pain

Bench

- 40 x 3

- 45 x 3

- 47.5 x 3

- 50 x 3

- 52.5 x 2

"We are masters of our own destiny."

LOVE WEEKENDS

Love weekends and all that they bring:

* Friday night conversation with husband.

* Saturday morning Soccer.

* Grocery shopping.

* Walk along Eagle Street Pier and through Botanical Gardens with family.

* Afternoon siesta.

* Saturday night drinks, pizza and laughs with the family.

* Sunday morning sleep-in ;)

* Church.

* Doing everything together as a family.

* Lunchtime snooze.

* Afternoon in kitchen with daughter cooking lamb roast.

* Family dinner.

* Nightly wrap up and free time.

"Having the perfect body is a negative and unhealthy outcome of a society too focused on material values."

LOVIN' LIFE

Today I did a little bit of this:
















Laughed on the phone with this sexy spunk:










Then went for one of these:

And then had hot chocolate with this gorgeous girl:

Love my friends, love my life, love me!

"Peace with yourself is a far greater gift than having arms like Pauline."

THE SOCIAL BUTTERFLY

Have I mentioned how much I love Brisbane? This morning it was bright lights and city streets that entertained me until I sort of got lost. Must have taken a wrong turn somewhere along the line and ended up in the North Quay vicinity. Weaved my way across the roads until I came to the QUT and asked the security guard which way home. As I wanted to be home before Dave took the kids to school I had to run as fast as I could which, for me NOT being a runner, nearly killed me.

Had a great session training with Matt throwing around some stupidly heavy weights. I can shoulder press as much as I bench - what's with that?

Borders, in the city, became my next stop doing some research and reading. I love book stores and could spend all day in there. I seem to get lost in the silence of myself.

It seems I've become a social butterfly this week with today's companion being an ex-client/friend from Genesis days whom recently moved to Ashgrove and starting training at Jetts and whilst I was there mucking around one day ran into her and we decided to catch up near her work when I moved to the big smoke. We went to a lovely little cafe in Margaret St and engaged in exciting conversation.

There's still more social engagements lined up in the coming days. Love hanging with cool people.

WELL HELLO WEDNESDAY

I'm having the BEST week!! A little sleep in this morning before checking out the crappy hotel gym consisting of 3 treadmills, 2 ellipticals, 1 old bike, a spin bike that the seat doesn't adjust, a home-style gym contraption, and a bench with no bar and no free weights in sight. The lights didn't work but the sun was just rising so I was able to partly see where I was walking. I decided to take the stairs home, all friggin' 18 flights of them!

Delivered Meals on Wheels and was saddened to see one of my deliveries had passed away.

Spent the rest of the day with Nicole and gorgeous little Eva until time to pick up the kids from school. We went for a walk with Eva in the pram before lunching at Grill'd. Love that place!

A DELIGHT TO THE SENSES

Today I ignored my head and followed my heart. Up the gently sloping road and into Roma Street Parkland. I walked through the stunning displays of gardens full of vivid colour, over the boardwalk spiralling through the subtropical rainforest, past the water cascading over the rocks, alongside the lake which is home to the endangered lungfish and many other fish and bird species, and lastly up the stairs of knowledge before a downward stroll home. Each precinct delighted my senses and my mind and body embraced a blanket of calm. It was soooooo beautiful.

It was then off to enjoy a delicious hot chocolate with an old friend from Singleton days. Was really great to catch up again after all this time.

Kid duties await now. I'm getting in practise now for being "the teacher" and having a laugh with the kids by having them refer to me as "Mrs Stark" during homework time. When wanting to ask a question they are to raise their hands but usually my response is, "you'll have to wait for Mr Stark to get home" as most of the time I don't know the answer - doh!!

ONE LAST CRACK WITH MATT

I've had a brilliant couple of days - surprise, surprise! There's always a calm that follows a storm!

Yesterday, early morning, but not as early as usual, I set out on foot for my first exploratory expedition of the city. I walked along Eagle St Pier, through the Botanical Gardens, over the Goodwill Bridge, in front of Kangaroo Point cliffs, back over the Storey Bridge, stopping briefly at Cathedral Square for a dose of meditation and inner calm, before heading home to feed the troops and get ready for the day.

Took the ferrets to Cathedral Square for some bubble blowing, soccer and handball whilst Dave finalised the last of the jobs at the last house. He then met us and we all walked to the City Library, loaded up on books and dvd's then trudged home with myself detouring to the closest Woolies to grab lunch and other supplies before dragging my arse up the steep hill, with grocery bags on each arm, to home. (Katie - I think my hill is bigger than yours!)

Got Skype set up, did the ironing (a first for me) then chilled for the evening in front of the box, or rather large flat screen, watching with admiration Jessica Watson on 60 minutes.

Today, really early, like 5.15 am, I again set off on foot only this time doing it in reverse. Decided that walking this route probably isn't a good idea that early when the sun is still sleeping therefore it's still dark and some of the pathways are not lit. I was armed with only my apartment key between thumb and forefinger, like as if that's gonna protect me (lol).

One of the highlights of my day was watching my daughter play her clarinet in a band concert. I sat there, watching, mesmerized by the music, with a huge smile on my face and tears in my eyes. Yes, I am a very proud Mummy.

Then it was off for a crack of deadlifting and benching with Matt. I've decided after this block of training sessions is finished to stop training with Matt. I figure the money I'm not spending on training will come in handy overseas. I've got three weeks left at The Lab. Unless a miracle happens I don't think I'll be seeing 150 kilograms on a bar in the air and not confident of a 140 kg deadlift either. And really, it's not that important to me anymore anyway. There's far more important people, places and events in my life right now. If it happens, great. If not, I won't lose any sleep over it.

Deadlift
- 100 x 3
- 110 x 3
- 115 x 3
- 120 x 3
- 125 x 3
- 130 x 0

Bench
- 35 x 5
- 40 x 5
- 45 x 5
- 47.5 x 3
- 50 x 3
- 52.5 x 0

SO.......................

It's been a busy, stressful week which I'm glad to see the back of. To recap:

Mother-in-Law arrived last Saturday and has just left tonight. Need I say more?

KatieP arrived last Saturday late afternoon. Had a fabulous dinner at The Grove with Nicole, Lyndsay and Katie.

Sunday (Mothers' Day) we went to breaky at Jeremiah's cafe then hubby and I drove Katie to the Gold Coast where she was staying for a conference ;).

On the way home we stopped and bought this:

ASUS K72JR K72JR-TY028X Notebook.

All data has been transferred from my old hard drive to here ready for our trip.

Monday it was training with the Mattstar, organising stuff and general running around.

Tuesday morning I flew to Melbourne to pay for our Uzes (Provence - France) accomodation carrying $11000 in folding stuff. My dad, whom I have not seen for quite a few years, picked me up from the airport and took me to the cafe where I met a man and did the deal. We then drove an hour and a half to his place where I got to see where he lived and have a cuppa and a chat and make sure for myself that he was ok after just finishing his cancer treatment. It was then back to the airport getting home quite late that night.

Wednesday I was back delivering Meals on Wheels, training with Matt again and still packing.

Thursday we moved into The Ridge to which we are greeted each night with this beautiful view:

That afternoon we had our last Rabies shot before going back for one last load. It was a long and tiring day. Lucky for us St Paul's Tavern is right across the road and dinner was served.

Got some great news from Mum saying that the results from her scan were all good and that there is no sign of growths. This was awesome news and just the lift she needed. Only one more treatment in June to go now.

Friday it was up early to meet the removalist to take our stuff to the storage shed.

It was touch and go as to whether all our gear would fit in but with a lot of strategic packing we got it all, bar the trampoline, into the 20 square metre shed. Ain't nothing else going in there though as you open the roller door and it's floor to ceiling chockas so there'll have to be a bit more offloading before we leave in 10 weeks time. Again, another long, tiring and stressful day and I arrived home to wine o'clock, and a lot of wine too! Pizza Capers got it's first ever run for dinner before passing out for the night.

Today has been little boy's soccer:

I organised the internet and finished unpacking. We're all done now and looking forward to the coming weeks, each week being one week closer to our departure.

Tomorrow morning I plan on getting up early and doing my morning walk along the Brisbane River. I'm looking forward to exploring the city and seeing more of the inner city.

Before packing up I was approaching Agents to accept my book for submission to Publishers but it seems that this is harder than expected with my genre being a crowded market. Majena (my writing mentor) has suggested some other options which I'll look into this week.

BYE BYE MIA

Dear Mrs Mia Wallace

The time has come, my four legged friend, to say goodbye and part ways. Tommorrow, in the morning, I will say, "good morning Mummy's little baby," fill your bowl with food, stroke you from head to tail one last time, and let you eat your breakfast. It will be, a little while, after this that I pack your gear and take you to the Vets for them to find you a new home. I'm sorry we have to do this but I'm sure you'll be safe and happy whereever you end up. Thank you for all the times you made me smile with your playful antics, warm eyes, snuggle up and reassuring purr. You truly are a beautiful cat and we won't ever forget you. You'll be surely missed.

Love Mummy

PACKING UP

One of the reasons I wanted to go on this adventure is to learn to live more simply, with less stuff. To appreciate the simple things in life. Although I am grateful and appreciative of the lifestyle we do lead, I'd like to see and really feel just how lucky we are. I'm in the process of dealing with all of our "stuff" and packing up the house ready to move on in just over a week's time. It's taking some real thinking on my part deciding what we will need when we move to the city, what we might need which will need to be accessible in the storage shed, and what we really don't need ever again. The rest is being packed in boxes until our return. I'm discovering that packing can be complicated. It's forced me to take stock of my life. Past, present and future collide whilst sitting before an open cupboard. Each piece of stuff stirs memories from when it was acquired and the feelings attached, whilst questioning whether we need it triggers deliberations about priorities and daydreams about where we may go. Each day I try to pack a little and end up deliberating and making a mess until remembering how to eat an elephant - one bite at a time, and then slowly but surely boxes seem to be stacking up.